Matlab jokes or puns

If the bar is too high, you can lower it.

>> bar(flip(sort(rand(1,2))))

What did the string say to the rope variable?

I don't know, I can't find the thread.

Q: Why did the 30-60-90 triangle marry the 45-45-90 triangle? A: They were right for each other

reversible is efficient than irreversible

trying to be funny - anyone help me?

Type "spy" on command window of Matlab R2013a to see a real spy!

She >> You don't love me anymore...

Engineer >> What, What are you saying... why?

She >> Tell me then.. Who is that "matlab" that you mentioned while you're sleeping ...

She >> No, "Matlab", she is my assistant in work. In addition, she is married to "Simulink" since 1984.

Engineer's Wife >> ok

You know what's odd?

Every other number.

Old mathematicians never die; they just lose some of their functions.

The average maths joke is pretty mean

Math is like love; a simple idea, but it can get complicated.

Do you know a statistics joke? Probably, but it is mean.

These are so bad, my NaN could do better!

There are 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.

What do organic mathematicians throw into their fireplaces? Natural Logs.

"The order of the tractors do not change the viaduct", the same as the order of the factors does not alter the product.

Yes, I changed my World of Warcraft by Matlab * - *!

-Do you know the symbol of the sodium? -NAh

Why was 6 afraid of 7? -Because 7 8 9!

Why is a math book always unhappy?

Because it always has lots of problems.

matlab is not mat in a lab

Why do you use matlab to create plots and graphs? Because its so easy to implement in my Latex documents.

Said no social studies student ever

why do I wait? semicolon

Joey: What are up to these days brah?

Chandler: Nothing much bruh, Just busy with my labs.

Joey: Oh, I'm also quite busy with my lab.

chandler: But bro, you don't have any labs this semester.

Joey: I have bro, MAT_LAB!

*Joey will be Joey*

Matlab = MAd Through LAB

There needs to be a matlab script that can calculate what the color of nine (9) smells like

How many simulationists does it take to replace a lightbulb? Infinity: Each one builds a fully validated model, but the light actually never goes on.

She >> You don't love me anymore... Engineer >> What, What are you saying... why? She >> Tell me then.. Who is that "matlab" that you mentioned while you're sleeping ... She >> No, "Matlab", she is my assistant in work. In addition, she is married to "Simulink" since 1984. Engineer's Wife >> ok my favorite

In our Local Language here in Pakistan when we write MATLAB during chat conversations it is falsely interpreted by our friends. Because Matlab in Urdu means " meaning" . Its funny when People ask you if you did Matlab assignment when speaking Urdu.

Well played. Poor exp (x) :(

a fool walks into a bar, takes a look around and says "Hello world!" xD.

Allow me to go off on a tangent about the famous Indian chief, SoaCahToa!

There is need to work on .tgf file for meshing

Why a man always dream that his wish of MATLAB comes true ? Because according to him MATLAB also means * | | May all the Lakes are BEER||*.

Simulations can be run again and again ...but life has no retakes

What's green and homeomorphic to the open unit interval?

The real lime!!!

What's purple and commutes?

An abelian grape!

while not succeeded
try again
end

What is the actual translation of Matlab in Arabic

A laboratory died!!! True story :)

What's the Object oriented way of becoming wealthy? A: Inheritance

way to make me crash my MatLab...

%LB Sim
sys = 'LB_Simulationist';
open_system(sys);
run(sys);
% Lightbulb == 1 (On) // == 0 OFF
Lightbulb = simout.data;
num_sims = 1;
while Lightbulb <= 0
      run(sys);
      Lightbulb = simout.data;
      num_sims = num_sims + 1;
  end

What do the wise sages use and search for during life? मतलब!

(please copy and paste that into Google translate and look at the English pronunciation and the Hindi translation)

Everytime I transfer the type of an image, like

I = single(imread("one_image.jpg"));

I always repeat silently, 'single'. And there shall never be one image. So I repeat again and again.

MATLAB = Man At Table Losing Appetite and Beer

"help" is a great feature in Matlab...and one day while looking for a function shortcut i found this gem.. and laughed

>> help fun

fun not found.

if you == have_a_little_time
   disp('Great! You are reading my comment.')
elseif you == have_no_time
   disp('Oh man! How you can be so busy?')
else
   disp('There is lots of fun.')
end

haha, I don't know hot to react...

Mathematics is made of 50 percent formulas, 50 percent proofs, and 50 percent imagination.

its a LabMat! Labrador on a Mat

Do you clear all the mess in your room?

Matlab is so possessive that it wont let Simulink interact with us without it!

What does Matlab call its grandmother? NaN

Of course, Simulink is deserved to be under control.

What a funny community!

What is the sign on the door of an internet hacker? 'Gone Phishing' :)

>>Funny Coding at Matlab.

give printf command to get a easter eggs :)

Q: 0 is false and 1 is true, right? A: 1

Matlab could have been as cool as Batman if it had one LESS letter l and one New N!

MATLAB Jokes... Compilation Error... !!! Lol

V=[cos(pi/180*Min(j,D))*cos(pi/180*Min(j,Dip)) ...
  sin(pi/180*Min(j,D))*cos(pi/180*Min(j,Dip)) ...
  -sin(pi/180*Min(j,Dip))];)

Error: Unbalanced or unexpected parenthesis or bracket.

I found it: it is winking at the end of the code ;)

My teacher asked me to bring calculator in class, so i brought MATLAB.

Can you figure out the plot?

Two coordinates are talking. What did one coordinate say to the other ?

"I do see your point"

I can see your "view", but your "point" is totally out of "plot".

How to calc my aeroplane?

By hand or MATLAB!!

Calc the area under the plane

Australian people say Matlab but say Maaalab

   >>social life
    Undefined function or variable 'social'.
    Did you mean:
    >> scal life

Yes, sorry MatLab I did mean "scal life"...

Spent one month trying to fix Maaalab code....

Missing one period :(

Make one error with matlab...

Copy Delete Paste...

Wait That's Maple.

How many programmers are needed to change a light bulb? NaN, it`s a hardwareproblem.

A manager and a programmer are travelling by car for a business meeting. Suddenly, the car engine fails and the manager says: "what should we do now? Can you fix it?" "Sure, it's easy, I do it every time my PC fails - let's get off the car, wait for a while and then get in again!"

in Persian language has title meaning

20160305-163548-img1.jpg

In hindi language matlab means meaning

What will be the sum of "love" ?? How could be even "love" have

sum. But matlab knows...

While function and Wife function are similar in nature. while(1) :loop will always be executed with out any break; wife(1) :wife gives only one option to listen to her which should be executed by husband with out any excuse

Why did the inmate want to learn Matlab? Just for cellfun.

Any jokes, good or bad, let's hear it.

><The real joke is I don't know about MATLAB><

Why do mathematicians always get Christmas and Halloween mixed up? Because Oct 31 = Dec 25

i dont know it could be a joke but anyway it is here: People tell me write code in C++ because matlab is slow and c++ is fastest, but matlab is faster when i test it using lot of GUI for real.

It seems matlab is faster than C++

MATLAB is allrounder!!

Wanna keep MATLAB busy with single command.

pause(inf);

wanna create an m-file which could make someone fall in love with me...What is the code for???Can any1 suggest:)

Fun overloaded programs will be updated as an extravagant stuff.

Matlab is a good tool

What was Hodor's name if he was using matlab ?

Holdon;

t = linspace(-pi,pi, 350);
X = t .* sin( pi * sin(t)./t);
Y = -abs(t) .* cos( pi * sin(t)./t);
plot(X,Y);
fill(X, Y, 'r');
set(gcf, 'Position', get(0,'Screensize'));
title('Happy Birthday!', 'FontSize', 28);

Matlab is an eraser, pen and notebook for engineers. - New World - :))

Why did I divide sine by tan? Just cos I can!

why do 6 afraid of 7? cos 7 8 9

Matlab(In English) Matlab(In Hindi) ?

What did the zero say to the eight? ::::Nice Belt::: "0 turns 8"

if you plot 8 and 0 on X and Y , who will be on Z?

where can i find guide for GUIDE ?

Matlab is like some kind of a religion, if he doesn't know the answer then he send you a NaN (misspelling of Nun)

matlab is very intresting in simulation if we connect low value device to high capacity then matlab always answered

i: Be rational! pi: Get real!

Matlab please marry me.

If you read MATLAB in Hindi, it would be मतलब which means 'Meaning'?!

Life is complex: it has both real and imaginary components.

MATLAB I am curious you

Q: Why do mathematicians like parks?

A: Because of all the natural logs.

Tonight We Matlab in Hell

I hop there will a fun toolbox in MATLAB. Set the parameters and keep laughing.

matlab jokes and pun are not visible to me. I don't know why

I don't like to see that matlab accepts subroutines on jokes and puns.

There once was a humble developer,

Who tried simulating a propellerer,

'When it tries to spin

The out flows in,'

But backwards his model ran betterer.

- Larry Kyrala (In response to a coworker asking how to write a clean limerick rhyming with 'developer'. 2009-02-20)

K>> last_err
Undefined function or variable 'last_err'.
Did you mean:
K>> lasterr
ans =
Undefined function or variable 'last_err'.

Did you hear the one about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with pencil and paper.

Did you ever hear the joke about the Matlab toolbox equivalent to a poor poet's handbook?....Yeah, me neither.

Have you ever heard about MATLAB toolbox that prepares you a coffee? Be sure to have MOKA port on your laptop!!!

MATLAB matlab(in Hindi) MATLAB!!

i am adjusted... i am showing off.. these lines not for me.. these are inbuilt code :D :D [(imadjust, imshow)]...

imagesc(get(gcf,'PointerShapeCData')); colormap([0 0 0 ; 1 1 .5]); axis image; axis off; set(gcf,'pointer','custom')

i am adjusted... i am showing off.. these lines not for me.. these are inbuilt code :D :D [(imadjust, imshow)]...

I fell in love when i first MET-LAB. So i continued working in LAB as scientist...hehe ;)

I thought it is METH LAB so I came here.

i am adjusted... i am showing off.. these lines not for me.. these are inbuilt code :D :D [(imadjust, imshow)]...

seriously??? cool stuff dude! yeah this inbuilt code is indeed over the top! :P :D :D

I am surprised to see this stuff seriously :))))

You can Excel with MATLAB ;)

i am fully amazed with its functions

Q: Why do mathematicians like parks?

A: Because of all the natural logs.

power(byThe, MATLAB)

>> doc Matlab jokes or puns

To mathematicians, solutions mean finding the answers. But to chemists, solutions are things that are still all mixed up.

why a turtle is so slow ?? mmmm let me think... what are you exactly asking FOR ?? ... maybe no one is waiting FOR ... FOR example, with other animals ...

If I had a Labrador named Matt to follow me around, my life would be complete.

->insert matlab pun function here

A: "What is the integral of 1/cabin?"

B: "log cabin."

A: "Nope, houseboat--you forgot the C."

function fun()

   printf('Have fun!');
end

Helpdesk: Good day. How may I help you? Customer: Hello... I can't print. Helpdesk: Would you click on start for me and... Customer: Listen pal, don't start getting technical! I'm not Bill G...

want to know about matlab f... ! , it's stuck as usual. "help f..." suggest that f... is funny.

LastName = {'Smith';'Johnson';'Williams';'Jones';'Brown'};
Character = ['lazy1';'short';'urgly'; 'sleep';'talke'];
EyesFeature = ['sqaur';'recta';'brown';'Bluee';'spher'];
T = table(Character,EyesFeature,'RowNames',LastName);
>> T

T =

                  Character    EyesFeature
                  _________    ___________

      Smith       lazy1        sqaur      
      Johnson     short        recta      
      Williams    urgly        brown      
      Jones       sleep        Bluee      
      Brown       talke        spher

Deaf mathematicians communicate through sin language.

In Egypt : Matlab like female name Mahitab So, when someone asks do you like Matlab I reply 'Matlab or Mahitab'

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